Welcome to the Mental Nudge
- Diane Jenifer Trif
- Jan 1, 2024
- 8 min read
Updated: Feb 18, 2024
Hello! If you have found your way to this little corner of the internet then we have something in common. Like me, you probably want to live an authentic life.
You probably know how exhausting it can feel to juggle life’s responsibilities while trying to make progress toward your ideal life while dealing with overwhelming expectations in an increasingly confusing world.
Sounds like a lot right?
This is how I've felt for a long time.
If you've ever felt that life is dragging you down, despite your best efforts to make meaningful changes and reach your goals, you should know that it's not just a "you" problem. Despite all the tips, books, journals, podcasts, and information available at our fingertips so many of us can't seem to break out of bad habits or hang onto positive ones for very long. Why is that?
Have you ever felt like no matter how hard you tried, for every step forward life was taking you two steps back?
I know that feeling well. But I have come to believe it's not entirely our fault.
It turns out that unconscious and external influences play a big role in this negative cycle. Simply put, we were never taught how to think clearly or set up an environment to help us reach our goals.
Our brains are not designed to make us "happy".
The world is not set up to make it easy for us to succeed
(More on that in the long(er) version below).
However, with the power of nudges - insights, reminders, and tools for self-reflection - we can modify both our internal and external environment to work for us. You can create conditions that make it easier to achieve health, happiness, or whatever else you aim towards by being intentional. Where our tendency to be human pushes us to make mistakes, I believe nudges can help.
The Short and Sweet:
Getting the most out of life starts by understanding how you can use psychology and behavioral science to your benefit! This is a space to learn and apply the best insights from the science of well-being and behavior change.
Are you looking to get a better understanding of yourself and how your unconscious motivates certain behaviors? Do you have a goal to make changes in your life, but don't know where to start? This space will help you learn and create personalized nudges toward your well-being that can lead to more connection, joy, meaning, and fulfillment.
That's it! Those are the basics. If you have more time I encourage you to dive deeper into this post. I cover the following topics below:
“The Long(er) Version”
Stop Living on Autopilot: Introducing The MentalNudge
As a well-being practitioner, I have devoted hours to establishing connections with individuals in pursuit of greater wholeness and alignment. My research led me to hundreds of books and practices of schools and organizations on how they effectively foster well-being for the whole person. Engaging conversations with friends and strangers confirmed the obvious - it feels difficult to find satisfaction or contentment amidst this ever-evolving, saturated world we live in. The year 2020 accelerated this trend, but it in no way created it. The world has been going in this direction for a while🔍.
To be clear, happiness has always been this elusive, abstract construct that humans have chased for centuries. That is not new. But what seems to have emerged in the last 20 years has been a collective inability to feel like we are at least making good progress in that direction. People agree it just feels harder.
While all the key metrics we use to measure progress in the world (GDP, child mortality rates, poverty rates, life expectancy, access to education, technology…etc.) have been trending upwards, our ability to feel good about our lives and the state of the world has been declining🔍. Understandably, the world has gone through a crisis in the last 2 years. We are also starting to de-stigmatize talking about these issues, so people feel confident to seek help. This is good.
Mental health care is an essential part of our society, yet many find it unfulfilling and difficult to access. Even those with insurance can struggle to locate a therapist they trust; instead relying on the internet for answers that aren't always right or complete, and can lead to even more confusion. To try and fill in some of these gaps, technology provides online chatbots and teletherapy platforms which sound helpful but have many obvious dangers associated with them.
Here's the thing: I believe that you may already know some of what it takes to care for your mind and achieve your goals. The information is everywhere. It's not enough to be equipped with knowledge - we need support and guidance to apply it. We need action. Fortunately, help is available in forming the practical skills that can enable you on your journey of self-reflection, focus, and experimentation so lasting change becomes doable.
Why is it so hard to change?
Life is faster and more demanding now.
There's a constant increase in workloads, streaming options, social engagements, and digital content. The hustle and bustle of modern society can leave us feeling overwhelmed and distracted, making it difficult to stay on track. To make matters worse, our human nature often leads us astray, even when we have the best intentions. This can result in what economists call "dynamically inconsistent behavior," 🔍 where we believe we'll make better choices in the future but struggle to follow through when the time comes.
There's also a finite amount of attention we can devote to any given task, leaving us susceptible to distractions and time-wasters. And let's not forget about the outside forces that influence us, from governments and corporations to technology companies. Sometimes, these systems don't make it easy for us to make choices that align with our best interests. (If you’re interested in going deeper into this topic, I highly recommend the book Stolen Focus: Why You Can't Pay Attention by Johann Hari)
It's no wonder many of us feel like we're drowning in the chaos of the modern world.
Life is moving faster than ever before, which can make it difficult to keep up with everything. But there's also good news! Researchers are now focused on what actually works to boost our happiness, health, and overall well-being. Specifically, two fields, positive psychology, and behavioral science, are looking to answer some these important questions. Lucky for us, their findings have given us tremendous insights into how we can live our lives to the fullest. The Mental Nudge is a space dedicated to integrating key concepts and practices from both fields.
What the heck is a “nudge”?
Have you heard of the term "soft paternalism"? It's a concept that recognizes that as humans, we're not always the best at making optimal choices. However, there are ways to support ourselves in making better decisions without forcing us to do anything we don't want to. One of these ways is through gentle "nudges". These can come in the form of clear messaging, being transparent with information, suggestions, or reminders. Rather than telling us what to do, nudges simply guide us in the right direction. Ultimately, soft paternalism is all about freedom of choice, and nudges are just a helpful tool in guiding us to the best outcomes.
The concept of "nudging" comes from behavioral economics and suggests you can influence your behavior (or others) just by the way you design your environment - this is called "choice architecture". It's a game-changer and the book Nudge by Richard Thaler and Cass Sunstein.* explores this concept in-depth from a wider policy perspective. The scope of this site is to narrow down the concept of nudges for personal use.
Nudges can be your secret weapon for a better life. Unfortunately, there are many unconscious influences are leading us down a path of distraction, consumerism, and poor health decisions. As the authors of Nudge put it “No one has ever made any money by encouraging people not to gamble”.
Every time you interact with something - your phone, your shopping list, even your own thoughts - you're being influenced in some direction. But the best part is, once you start noticing this, you can take control and use it to your advantage. (The infographic shows some examples of the way we are being "nudged")
Life is complicated.
Decisions and life can be difficult to navigate - we all want the best for ourselves, but often don't know what that is. Rarely do we get influenced in the right direction, or have systems that work for us.
With so many complex decisions needed daily, it's not surprising that sometimes our choices aren't perfect.
We are humans, not machines.
We have a pesky habit of predicting future behavior imperfectly - yet expectations remain high regardless. It’s time we understood how – and why – humans make certain decisions: aligning knowledge with real-world practices will help you make better decisions and get better outcomes overall.
Do you feel properly equipped to identify the emotional and psychological barriers that are keeping you stuck in a negative loop? Self-reflection is difficult.
We all struggle with hard-to-detect psychological biases that can make it even harder. You're not alone in this - most of us weren't taught how to think objectively - which sadly makes us vulnerable to being influenced in ways that do not align with who we are.
Although knowledge comes easy in today's world, achieving unclouded thinking takes more effort. When equipped with the right tools though, we have greater potential for making lasting changes!
Welcome to the journey.
So nudges can be powerful motivational tools. Nudges can help us gain more information, alter our environment, and redirect our attention to make better choices. The MentalNudge is a place to learn about these tools - how and why they work. Not every tool is right for every person, this is a journey of self-experimentation. We don't try to teach you what to do, but rather expose you to as many strategies as possible so you can make your own discoveries.
I have spent over a decade diving into the research, books, and people that have important things to say about well-being and behavior change. The site is organized into two sections: Learning (knowledge) and Nudges (tools) - both are evidence-informed. If and when you want to do your own research, sources are linked like this 🔍 throughout.
We all face roadblocks and challenges when it comes to making choices that are right for us. I'm here with you every step of the way, testing out strategies and tools that work. This is an exploration of how each one of us can create change on our own terms. I strongly want this space to encourage your own self-reflection in finding what you really want and what works for you.
If taking back control of your life and choices sounds appealing to you, I encourage you to join me on this journey. Subscribing to the newsletter is a great place to start. You'll get insights and reminders to help keep you motivated and an extra boost towards making those well-being decisions easier and more constructive. The MentalNudge is more than just learning knowledge and using tools; it's about self-reflection, conversations, and stepping onto a path of resilience and success through conscious decision-making.
*Disclosure: This post contains affiliate links to books I've read and loved. At no additional cost to you, I may earn a small commission if you decide to make a purchase via these links.